How I (finally) got my stupid PHP to work

/configure --with-apxs2 --with-pear --with-gd --enable-pdo --with-pdo_sqlite --with-zlib --with-mysqli --with-mcrypt=/opt/local/var/macports/software/libmcrypt/2.5.8_0/opt/local --with-mysql=/usr/local/mysql --with-pdo-mysql=/usr/local/mysql --with-curl --enable-calendar --enable-gd-native-ttf --with-ttf=/usr/X11R6 --with-freetype-dir=/usr/X11R6 --with-jpeg-dir --with-xpm-dir --enable-soap

-_-

Hope these are all the extensions needed